How to be civilized on the space frontier
Chapter 6: Having company for dinner.
It does not matter that you’ve seen the same faces every day for months on end; you’d still like to invite everyone over to “your module” for dinner. With invitations accepted, you prepare for the occasion. But what is the expected etiquette for entertaining in orbit? How do you arrange things so your guests will not think you are gauche? Here are a few space-tested guidelines to help in the preparations.
Have plenty of food, and serve your very best. Now is the time to break out those thermal-stabilized pouches of beef steak that you have been hoarding. Bring out any specialty item from your personal crew allotment (these items arrive on the periodic unmanned resupply spacecraft that visit us). Perhaps you can share a can of smoked anchovies,
The choice of beverage is rather limited. You can serve the standard ones: coffee, tea, and artificially flavored, artificially colored, sugar-loaded, fruit-replica drinks. All, of course, are served in a bag, and you sip the fluid through a straw. The image of an insect sucking the juices from some lower insect may come to mind, but in space it is considered impolite to give voice to such imagery.
You can provide a special treat if you have access to one of the research refrigerators. In space, all your food is either hot or at room temperature. When you live in an isothermal environment, it can be a real treat to serve your guests a bag of cold water.
For special occasions—perhaps after a space walk or the docking of a resupply vehicle—you can serve your beverages in a “zero-g” cup. This is something you will have to make from scrap plastic sheeting (instructions are in Appendix C). These cups allow you to sip beverages from an open container, like we do on Earth. Zero-g cups, unlike bags with straws, are better for social rituals like toasting, and will bring a smile to the faces of your guests.
It is important to dress up your galley. Have full packets of wet and dry wipes within easy reach on the galley table. Take any partial packets and save them for another time. Empty the trash bins. A full trash bin is problematic; a handful of small things typically float out when new items are added. This rudely interrupts conversation while everyone scatters to collect the floating debris. It is good to have two trash bins; the standard-sized one for largish items, and an old wet wipe container for small ones. This separation of smaller trash—cutoff pouch corners, food crumbs, and wrappers—helps prevents their release when the lid is opened. Be sure to label this wet wipe container “trash”. Newly arrived crew may not be aware of this trash protocol, so it is best to politely demonstrate by example. They will learn quickly enough.
Clean the food scissors. Scissors are needed to open food pouches, as tearing them along the built-in perforations usually results in liberating hot droplets of fatty ooze and other asteroid-like particles. That’s why, if the scissors aren’t kept clean, they become caked in solidified gravy to the point where they become glued shut (not to mention being slightly repulsive). Such a state is considered rude, so clean your scissors before the guests arrive.
Always have a loaner spoon available. In weightlessness, it is easy to lose things. It is not unusual in a group of six for someone’s spoon to have floated off. Having a clean loaner spoon allows for the evening to continue and the conversation to flow. It is rude to give your guest a loaner spoon caked in crud from the last time it was used. The lost spoon is usually found by morning, stuck to a ventilator inlet screen, and your guest will appreciate it being returned.
Always put out new tape. The galley table has multiple spots of Velcro to park packets of food. However, not all packets and pouches have mating spots of Velcro, which means they can’t be set down on the table. Several strips of duct tape, carefully folded so the adhesive side is out (see Appendix D for instructions), allows such containers to be parked on the table. Tape left over from the previous week, while perfectly functional, collects errant crumbs, hairs, lint, and other unsightly things. Displaying dirty tape is exceedingly rude to your guests; always put out new, clean tape.
In space, catching food in your mouth is considered polite. Opening wide and making a clean catch will most always bring cheers from your guests. In one impressive gulp, you can leave them with the image of some sea creature inhaling another. Catching food in your mouth, like belching at the table (considered impolite in most cultures, but a compliment to the chef in others) is rude on Earth but de rigueur in space.
By following these simple rules, you will ensure a delightful evening with your guests. And remember, on the space frontier, the etiquette book is still being written. I encourage you to invent new ways of conducting everyday life, including entertaining. It is one of the reasons we find ourselves here in the first place.
Don’s blog also appears at airspacemag.com.
18 thoughts on “An Astronaut’s Guide to Space Etiquette”
Pure genius! There exists grace and sophication even in space, and Emily Post would be proud.
SO…when can I expect an invitation? You could just throw it out tied to a aircraft as you speed over Indianapolis!
Wow! This is so fantastic, thank you for sharing. Conceptually you realize living is zero gravity would take a level of planning and adjustment but framing it in an everyday activity like eating with friends really illustrates this. Thank you, thank you!
Ummm, New Mexico Green Chili!! We should get a special batch you!
E k tal incluir uma sobremesas típica Portuguesa the “Pasteis de Nata”:D isto só Português entende/ dextrose glucose monosaccharide with carbohydrates very important in biology/the human cells above earth also need energy sources with “Pasteis de Nata” DELICIOUS ihihih
This was absolutely lovely. It’s easy to forget that the astronauts living and working in the ISS have social lives as well. My favorite bit was about randomly floating spoons.
Thank you for the wonderful briefing. It gives an idea of how life is up there. Also interesting to note that you have reported on agro experiments results, “seed germination at zero garvity” i presume. Very interesing. keep it up!
What you wrote made me laugh. It is interesting to see that in space you have all these rituals.
I like the image of “the insect” and the way to catch food with your mouth in the air.
It is very nice to you to share your exquisite local food.
It had reminded me that one day, after several months travelling and camping in South America (crossing the continent from East to West), I ran away from my team (24 persons) and walked about 1 km away from them in order to eat a chocolate bar. Do not wanted to share!!!!
Excellent. A most enjoyable read. Sure wish I could come up for a visit.
Excellent Reading. Keep up the good work. Sure wish I could pop up there for a visit.
Reading your post, I feel like reading an Arthur Clarke´s novel. Really interesting, and as you say – “on the space frontier, the etiquette book is still being written”. Congratulations for your detailed explanation, and have a nice return home tomorrow.
Don Pettit has become one of my favorite astronauts! I love his keen, scientific perspective, witty humor and genuine enthusiasm to share with everyone each of his thoughts or cool discoveries! His posts, like his earlier ones about painting on water films, are exactly some of the things that only a curious human mind, up out there in space, would even think up to investigate. He is the very living argument for the exploration of space by humans. His ability to connect and outreach to all, in such a human way, is such a benefit to NASA that I hope they keep him flying for as long as he wants!
I loved this! I have always wondered how people in space would eat collectivly. This was well written and entertaining as well. I was very impressed with the tape, one more use of duct tape! And very thoughful about the trash recepticle. But the best thing was about the scissors and how one should pay particular attention to cleanliness of that “tool”/utensil in the presence of dinner guests! Thanks so much for the inside scoop. Bon appetit!
I’d like to second the 7th comment. Your writing style does remind me of Arthur C. Clarke, who I grew up on. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and experiences in such a humourous way. I’m glad I discovered this blog!
I love you. Will you marry me?
(Okay, okay. I know you’re already married. But call me if it doesn’t work out.)
It is always a incredibly interesting to read articles like this. You can almost picture what it would be like and a cool insight for the vast majority that will never see the inside of the ISS in person. It’s stuff like this that you would not think about but gives clues to what such a living environment is like.
great satire a little long but well worth it
A little long but worth the read. Love the satire
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